My soup

“ Dear Web Designers: The 47M iOS devices Apple sold last quarter alone DO NOT RUN FLASH. #getthatthroughyourthickskulls ”

“ Man, fuck sendmail, typing m4 just made me get all ragey. I mean really, what a fucking god awful piece of trash fucking shithole crap! ”

“ Some people, when confronted with a problem, think "I know, I'll solve it." But the Void is inescapable and our short lives are meaningless. ”

“ "If I worked for Oracle, I'd fucking kill myself" -- @pipesec, trying to navigate http://t.co/BuLumTo4 #heartsandminds ”

“ Me: so guess what I torrented this weekend? C: what? Me: 45 gigs of Malware.... C: installing an adobe product? ”

“ It took five years, but Erlang has finally ruined me. Using languages with mutable data structures now feels like juggling chainsaws. ”

“ I just want to accept the invite. The bar at the top says I'm logged in; your error message tells me to fuck my own face. (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ ”

“ About to seriously lose my shit w.r.t. Google Calendar. Patent troll all you want, just don't ship horrible fuckwaste with your name on it. ”

“ The paperless office will happen not because it's The Future but because everyone hates effing printers. ”

“ "There's only a pause during the transition..." Flesh flays off a clattering skull as it rolls onto the floor. ”

“ "We detect network partitions using heartbeat timeouts." Eyes bulge out. Veins pulse as blood boils at room temperature. ”